Pregnancy Spotlight #1

Melissa

Age- 27

Location- Kent

Living situation- 3 bedroom house, owned. Engaged, with the wedding planned for this year (busy year). His work takes him away for months at a time, so sometimes I'll be solo parenting. His family close by. Mine still in North London. No drivers.

How far along are you? I’m currently 35 weeks (OMG)

Chosen any names? Yep, just the one. For a boy or a girl. We chose it the day after we found out, and we've not faltered from it- River. It has helped us connect to our baby.

Describe your pregnancy in a sentence- Weird, wonderful, and not what I was fully expecting.

Biggest surprise- How lonely the experience can be. At the end of the day, no matter how many people you speak to, or how many can sympathise, or how many others are going through the exact same things- when you feel nausea, that’s just you. When you can no longer do your jeans up, that’s only your jeans and your body. When you feel those early wriggles, they‘re just for you. And you can bet your arse that nobody else will be feeling your labour. It can be a good lonely, and it can be a bad lonely. But it is quite solitary.

Are you enjoying it?- Overall, yes. I’ve had it quite easy so far, even up into these last few weeks, and the end result is exciting. But it’s not without its hardships.

What frightens you most about parenthood- Losing myself to motherhood too much. I think I’ll be a better parent if I maintain who I was before I had a child. My quirks and eccentricities, my beliefs, and my personality are all going to be crucial to raising my child, and helping them thrive as an individual.

A product you’ve used that has been a lifesaver- There hasn't been that one product really. I like my birth ball, and my support belt- but honestly I think my determination has been my saving grace. Having done 22 weeks of this pregnancy alone, and tackling performances, travelling, and building furniture solo, the mind over matter approach has kept me healthy, physically and mentally.

Actually, scratch that. Bamboo breast pads- I've been leaking since I was 23 weeks and got sick of ruining bras and t-shirts.

Something you’re looking forward to- Milestones. The successes and the fails, especially in that first year.

Something you’re dreading- Cracked nipples. I accidentally scratched mine the other day when reaching for my phone and oh my god. Also, gifts that I hate. I don’t want to feel like I absolutely have to use them.

Piece of advice, no matter how obvious- This is your journey. Don’t bend to the will of anybody else. You, and your partner (if you have one) are who matters, along with your doctors and midwife. That is IT.


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